Victims from Both Sides
Sunday, May 18, 2014, 6:17 AM, 0 comments
What makes the thing between our thighs so appealing to be talked about? With so many news recently about sexual harassment cases that seem like spreading everywhere, media often draw too much attention on ‘who’ harasses ‘who’ without giving people enough idea about how to prevent the same case to happen again in the future. Hence, the victims are not only those who have been harassed or raped, but also the perpetrators themselves who are often misunderstood by society.
Why victims mostly go under the radar
Imagine this. If we have lost authority over our own body, what will we think we still have left?
What makes every sexual harassment cases very dangerous is that it makes the victims think that their future has gone dark in an instant. The fear of being judged, feeling dirty and full of sin, also losing trust over men will haunt the victims for unknown period of time. They’re still busy struggling with themselves to cope with their fear and trauma at the level they don’t want to involve other people into their problem, including their closest people. Not only that, society also takes a huge part in holding the victims back from admitting what has happened to them. People are often too focused on the ‘who’ and forget that it’s a case that can happen to anyone, including them. We need to direct people’s mindset not to give any comment if it’s not to help the victims or the perpetrators. Sometimes the labels given by the society are what make the victims more depressed and the perpetrators more eager to continue their doings. By educating the society, at least the victims will feel safer to open up and thus the perpetrators can be easier to arrest.
Will decades in jail or death penalty be enough?
To blame the perpetrators merely because of their crimes is not the wisest and most effective step to take. We’re talking about sexual cases here, something that the trigger is not only to satisfy one’s desire, but also abnormal biological thing that one can’t always control. Some people were just born with higher sexual hormone than others or different sexual preference, as same as some people were born with sharp nose or dark hair. It’s just something that we can’t choose and unfortunately, those who are labeled ‘different’ from society can’t control it in the way they won’t disturb others. Whether it’s because some kind of mental disorders or just uncontrolled desire, those who are called ‘sexual predators’ tend to aim those who seem ‘weaker’ than they are. By saying ‘weak’ it can come from various perspectives. It includes women, children, prisoners, or in extreme cases, even dead people. It somehow proves that the perpetrators posses some kind of inferior feeling towards themselves that they need to do things that make them feel superior; in this case by sexually harassing the weak ones. That's not the only reason, but there are also trauma from being sexually harassed before, and other personal things that only the perpetrators know. So putting them in rehabilitation until they’re able to control themselves is the best we can do at first before anything related to prison and any other punishment can be discussed and determined.
It’s not merely a body; it’s a temple for one’s soul
Looking around us with so many cases of abuses and harassment, it’s enough to be a proof that most of us haven’t completely noticed the importance of our well-being besides doing its biological function. It’s sad that most children who have been sexually harassed feel bad for themselves for feeling ‘good’ by being treated that way even though it felt a bit uncomfortable at first, and thus it makes them unconscious that what has happened to them is sexual harassment. Then there comes the vicious cycle; those victims become insensitive to anything related to body and sexuality and they assume that it’s okay to treat people that way too because they have ever been treated that way. And then bit by bit they start becoming the perpetrators. To prevent things like this happen again in the future, it’s important to be aware that our body is not just a biological being. What lies within our body needs other than food and water to maintain its existence, but rather our courage to say ‘no’ whenever anyone attempts to touch our body parts without our consent. So better put more attention to what’s inside, not just what looks good for our body. Educate our mind, feel good more, and feed the soul with prayers. If what’s inside is strong enough, it will be easier to take care of the outside.